Cannes: what images the word evokes. Ever since 1946, the city has become a film festival, and what a festival it is too. Streaking blonde starlets on the red carpet doing their best to attract the world media’s attention; fat, balding, cigar-chewing directors trying to hold them on their arms attempting to prove to everyone they still have ‘it’, and of course the real deal: the international movie stars consolidating their credentials by signing up for anything art-house. The Cannes film festival is a smorgasbord of publicity, bling-bling and of course, the films themselves.

The French call an obsession with cinematography cinephilia. Like all other ‘philias’, it takes over everything they do during the month of May. The Croisette – the gorgeous boulevard that runs through this town – is so thronged with people, it suddenly resembles a small street. The hotels are so choc-a-block, you’d be lucky to find a room in the basement, let alone the presidential suite. And there’s no airport. So unless you’re turning up in your 150 foot yacht (or on P Diddy’s), and have rented your own villa, here are a few tips on how to enjoy Cannes as only a tourist can.

When to go:

Anytime when the festival is not happening is my first choice. Obviously, this makes no sense if your aim is to gawp at the stars, or to try and get yourself noticed by Spielberg.

If you do opt for the peak season, expect to have to pay through the nose for absolutely everything, as well as to get dire service. People will probably notice your lack of resemblance to Nicole Kidman, so you can expect to just become a sights-seer.

Off-peak, Cannes is a gorgeous little town, with meandering paved streets, a chic marina and hills which are just the thing for those who simply love to get lost and catch a quiet view somewhere.

 

How to get there:

Cannes has an airport which is mostly used for private aircraft, so there are no direct flights to it from Malta. Try for a destination in the south and catch a connecting train: the best is Nice. Otherwise get a connection with Alitalia (if Alitalia is still in existence when you read this, expect cancellations and everything Alitalia is connected to) and fly via an Italian airport to the south.

Once out of the airport, the best way is to get a shuttle bus to the city: they’re very good value for money and comfortable. Most hotels will tell you to just walk it simply because the terminus is so close to many of them, but if lugging a massive piece of luggage is not your style, there are taxis everywhere.

 

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Where to stay:

As is to be expected, during the festival, prices sky-rocket and a room will cost what anyone will pay for it. The stars usually opt for private accommodation in one of the many villas dotted around, or if they’re publicity-hungry, book themselves into the A-list Hotel Majestic Barriere. Until a few years ago, the hotel only accepted payment in cash. All the hotels insist that you book for the entire period of 12 days, so it’s pointless trying to get a room for a few days.

If you can go off-peak, there’s a gorgeous little hotel which is a wonderful evocation of 70’s style. The Palais Stephanie Cannes [previously the Noga Hilton] has beds on elevated round platforms, surrounded by loveable and totally kitsch string curtains, as well as bathrooms that befit a wannabe. They have tea and coffee making facilities too, which is great in a town where a café creme costs a bunch of euro.

http://www.lucienbarriere.com/localized/en/hotel/etablissements/cannes_hotel_majestic_barriere.htm

 

 

Where are the films?

During the festival, the Noga Hilton is one of the many venues frequented by the actors themselves. Its red and white lobby sees hundreds cruising in and out catching one of the films being shown in the basement. Over the 12 days of the festival in May, you can catch the cinematic offerings of anywhere from China, to Australia and Afghanistan.

The real exhibitions though, are going on outside. Daily press conferences, a glimpse of a famous face buying a bag at Chanel or Yves Saint Laurent, and the antics on the massive boats will give you enough photos and things to talk about for the next few weeks.

 

And the food?

It’s France, so try as you might, you will probably not manage to eat badly. Since Cannes is in the South, you may as well sample the real bouillabaisse, a massive plate of seafood stew with anything from clams to mullet thrown in for good measure. Even a pizza in one of those restaurants seating hundreds manages to be good. But for the real deal, walk up the narrow streets and discover the chic little restaurants that may not be Michelin starred, but should be. The service is excellent, and the food to match.

 

And to read?

The May issue of Conde Naste Traveller usually has the latest updates. Before you go, swot up on a Rough Guide or Lonely Planet to the South of France, and when you’re there, one of the trade rags which Screen International and Variety distribute for free.

Doubtless, if you’re not there for the festival, you may as well take the latest Elmore Leonard paperback and simply bask on the wonderful beach. Who needs to be cooped up watching a film when they can be absorbing the sun anyway?